Thanks Hillary & Donald

My first presidential election and these are my choices?!?!? A sentiment shared among thousands of first time voters, myself included. I’ve been following politics all my life, at first because it was a big family matter, since one of my uncles is in congress, another is a mayor. Now I just like politics. Thanks Obama. Thanks Trump.

This election is the first of its kind that my family has ever seen. Politics is a dirty business, but this election has brought it to a new level. The majority of what has been discussed has had nothing to do with politics. This is a game show. The good in that, it has brought thousands more people into the political atmosphere and people are as passionate as ever for their candidate. The bad, one of these shady old people has to actually be president, and people are equally passionate about how much they hate the opposition. This isn’t a race on who is more loved, it’s on who is less hated.

Anyone can find a plethora of stories and information online that will make you hate either candidate. Are they all real? No. Are they embellished? Of course. Are these politicians as shady as they are old? You betcha. Have presidential politicians always been this corrupt? Or do we just know too much about people in the Information Age? Let’s talk about it.

Moving forward, expect more presidential elections to be equally as gory as this one. Blood, sweat and tears will be shed on the campaign trail. People are angry, some republicans are even hoping for a problematic term for Clinton assuming she wins, just to make it easier to elect a more qualified republican next election. Everything wrong in the past decade will be considered Hillary’s fault making it harder to reelect her, or any democratic in 2020, but it’s ok because Kanye’s got us all covered.

These two candidates are super scummy, but in reality, all candidates are, in fact all people are. We all have skeletons in the closet. We all have documents we want to keep hidden and shit in our email accounts we hope never comes to light. Nothing is gone if it’s transmitted technologically. We can find out so much more about people now. With instant online sharing, one little mess up and you’re the next trending topic, with your picture hanging high on the internet’s wall of infamy. Hillary does this to herself half the time with her desperate attempts to be the “cool Aunt” of America.

Fear based campaigns are shitty, but effective. Bernie ran a positive campaign and got kicked to the curb because that isn’t the mood of the country right now. It should be, we should have a more positive outlook on life and politics, but if two people have you scared for your life and one is throwing up the peace sign, you’re going to pay more attention to the scary old people than the cool old guy shooting hoops in a high school gym with his grandkids. We all naturally care more about threats than non-threats. This is human nature, and Hill and Don scare the best. They have set the new standard in politics. Moving forward, fear based campaigns may be the new norm. Sad. I’d rather be happy. Bring Bernie back.

No one can predict the outcome of this election. Just when we’re ready to say that one candidate will likely be the victor, boom- rape allegation, drug allegation, sick allegation, tapes released, emails released, pussy pussy pussy, kiss kiss kiss TIC TAC SHAKE.

Dirty. Going to take more than tic tacs to freshen up this country, since this is likely going to be how elections are conducted from now on. Thanks Hillary and Donald.

TIC TAC SHAKE! RUN!

What do you think is the future of American politics?

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